Home

Mantris Graph of the Week

love, dating, dating advice, love advice, romance, romantic advice, sex, marriage, love coaching, dating coaching
Submit yours to This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it !
Check out the MANTRIS GALLERY to see more real 4MPlanner graphs.
dating advice, amanda bynes, dating plan, romance, love, love advice, relationships, single, sex, love
 
Amanda Bynes loves
The Four Man Plan! 

Member Login

Login

No account yet? Register





 
Ice.com, Ice, jewelry, diamonds, ring, rings, necklace, necklaces, pendant, pendants, discount, sale
 
Beauty.com
 

Image

 

 

 

 

 

Have fun dammit! - Cindy Lu

 

 

Find these and more in the
FREE DOWNLOADS
area!

male, female, sex, dating, mantris, four, man, woman, single, sex, science

sex, dating, male, female, single, science, book

sex, dating, love, single, female, male, science

Chemistry.com
 
 
Chemistry.com
 
 
Apparel - Rock concert vintage and retro t-shirts
Bring In 2010 With The Four Man Plan!

Image

 

 

The Four Man Plan has been dubbed the ultimate in romantic science, so we caught up with its author and creator Cindy Lu to discover why this dating technique so successful.

As the name suggests, the basis of the Four Man Plan is to date, but not sleep with several men at the same time with total honesty so that they know that they are one of a number of potential suitors.   You keep track of how you feel about each of them with the help of some visual graphs, until you find the one that you know is right for you.

Cindy Lu came up with the plan after years of dating numerous Mr Wrong’s, and the book is frank, honest and packed full of humour and sound advice.  We spoke to her to find out how it all works and uncover the nuts and bolts of becoming a Four Man Planner!

Image How does The Four Man Plan change how you think about dating and love?

Image The Four Man Plan changes your perspective and turns dating into an absolute soul searching pleasure, because it takes the focus away from finding a lifelong partner to deciding what it is you really want.

When you start the Four Man Plan, you’ll find your perspective changes.  Dating isn’t about the hunt for one incredible man, it’s about being the most amazing woman that you are in any situation and falling in love with yourself.

Image Why is it essential men know they are part of The Four Man Plan?

 

Image Letting men know that you’re dating but not sleeping with other men does a number of critical things.  It lets the men know they are competing and if there is one thing men know how to do, it’s compete!

Suddenly, armed with the knowledge that they are one of a number of choices, they become more chivalrous, more interested and more honest about their own situation.

If they aren’t interested, they simply fall away with no drama – but if they are keen, it makes it crucial that at some point they will have to request, rather than assume exclusivity.

These days, in the world of internet dating, it’s almost assumed that all parties are “shopping.”  But serial monogamy, indiscriminate sex and obsessive husband hunting has gotten more and more common, so it’s important to let your men know that you aren’t that kind of girl!

 
Read more...
 
The Daily Mail features the 4MP!
Image
 

It all adds up: The square route to finding Mr Right

If you’re hoping to find ‘the one’, you need to meet as many men as possible and give them the chance to prove their worth. That’s the principle behind the Four Man Plan – a new maths-based guide to dating by Cindy Lu

 
Image
 

The Four Man Plan teaches you the basics of love as they should have been taught in school. The only requirement is a desire to take charge of your love life and doing something about it.

 

The point of the plan is to make sure you give yourself the best chance of meeting Mr Right. It’s like a 21st-century dance card – and your aim is to keep it full.

 

Your mission is to fill the chart with as many men as possible, and then see which of them are worth taking more seriously. As you 'collect' your men, represent them on the chart as above.

 
Read more...
 
Start The New Year With The Four Man Plan

Image

If the perfect relationship keeps eluding you, change your dating technique and bring in the New Year with The Four Man Plan.

After years of dating ‘Mr Wrongs’, Cindy Lu, author and creator of the Four Man Plan decided to change her dating technique.

She devised the Four Man Plan which as the name suggests, involves dating several men at the same time with total honesty, but sleeping with none of them.  You keep track of your potential suitors and wait until the one you want asks you for exclusivity.

With her honesty, frankness, humour and sound advice, her book is a must-read for any single woman looking for her ideal man.

We spoke to Cindy to find out more about The Four Man Plan and how it works.

“My ultimate wish for any girl who does the Four Man Plan is that she ends her run on the gerbil wheel of love,” she says.  “By the end of it you will have gained a deeper understanding about how much power you have within relationships, and changed how you perceive men and dating.”

Read on to find out how The Four Man Plan could help you find your ‘other half’ in 2010.

Change Your Dating Perspective
“The Four Man Plan will change how you think about dating and love,” explains Cindy.

“It turns dating into a soul searching pleasure because it takes the focus away from finding a lifelong partner to deciding what it is you really want.  Finding a man isn’t going to make you happy.  Falling in love with yourself, being your own best date and your most natural self in every situation, regardless of the man sitting across from you at the dinner table, is what women really seek.”

Brings Out The Chivalrous Side Of Your Men
“Once men know this is what you’re doing, they start competing for your affections and become more chivalrous,” explains Cindy.

“It’s only in recent decades that men haven’t needed to compete for a woman’s affections.  Remember Guinevere?  Dance cards?  Courtship?  Somewhere in their DNA it comes naturally to them, the way that having many suitors eventually becomes natural to the Four Man Planner!”

“If they aren’t interested, they will disappear without any drama, and if they are, they will need to ask for exclusivity rather than assume it.  For a lot of Four Man Planner’s learning how to “halve” a man, as we call it, which is the simple act of telling a man that you are “dating”, is the hardest part at first.   But you’ll be surprised at the positive reactions you get.    The earlier it is done, the better because honesty takes the guesswork out of dating.”

Read more...
 
Raves for The 4MP
 
 
“Single ladies will be emboldened by her sound hypothesis.”—
LA Weekly

“Effusively clever and perkily filthy.”—Entertainment Today

Takes the angst out of dating with walloping comic style.”—America Radio Network

"If you're curious about the details of The Plan--pick up a copy of the book. I did." -Hollywood Reporter

"Diversify your portfolio in the market of men...I have some investment research to do now." -Time Out, New York

“…Lu’s laugh-out-loud cheekiness was only outshined by her pearls of tried and true advice…” –Blogcritics Magazine

"The Four Man Plan is the next big thing in dating books!" -East Street Publications

 
 
4MPlanners' Reactions

 

"I hate to read.  I'm just not a reader. But when my best friend gave me the 4MP after a recent string of seemingly great first dates that never panned out, I was ready to try anything as a last ditch effort before joining a convent.  Not only did I read this book in two days, but I've now read it a SECOND time (UNHEARD of for me), and I constantly flip through it as a reference tool as I learn the Plan.

Now it's not a boyfriend I'm looking for, it's not a husband, it's just a little Quarter.  No biggie.  I can do that.  I'm so much more relaxed.  I've now joined match.com, and I'm able to approach this whole process with a mind that is more open than I've ever had in my dating life.  Thank you." -Yen

 

"Mrs. Cindy Lu.... I just got your audio book early this week, I think I have listened to it around 10 times. A few years ago I was involved in a marriage with a man who beat me. I think you may have saved my life.

None of the things you described in your book has ever been even remotely explained to me. Just before I got your book I decided to give up. I would never be loved. I would only be happy being alone with my cat.

I am going to give the plan a try. I am scared to do it, but at least this time, I actually have hope. YOUR book is a blessing. YOU are a blessing and I am glad you were born Mrs Lu. THANK YOU for taking the time to write a book to explain all this. I will not live and end my life as a cat lady thanks to you." -Rockie

 

Read more...
 
The 4MP Hits the UK!

Image

The Plan has hit the UK - and you can get it right here!

I'm so excited that The Four Man Plan has found its way across the pond.  The most exciting part is, I think you gals really get it and REALLY need it!

From what I hear so far, things are a little different over there.  Tell me if I'm wrong, but I've been told that it goes something like this: girl goes to pub or club, girl meets boy, girl and boy drink several pints or shots, girl and boy start snogging or more and POOF! you have a new boyfriend for the night, a week, or however long it lasts.  No "dates", no "asking out", no "getting to know each other".  Can this be so? 

I'm sure it's a generalization, and to be perfectly frank, it's not so different from how a lot of folks find themselves in relationships here.  But does that seem a bit random?  Wouldn't it seem more likely to be a successful relationship if you meet a man by the light of day?  I don't know, I kind of think it's a good idea to see if you can have a conversation with someone, and find out whether or not they are honest, loving and willing before locking on.  Don't get me wrong, I did it the other way a bunch of times, to my deep misery.

The US 4MPlanners have been using The Plan to a great deal of success.  Some find that their love lives are now manageable, make sense, more relaxing and most importantly FUN!  And of course, many have found themselves that ideal man, some after just a few short weeks, some after 65 weeks of planning, since the US version came out!  Join us in the FORUM, just click that big gray button on the left, and get all the dish, ask your questions and share your stories.  I pop in almost everyday to give advice, though it is rivaled by the wisdom of your fellow 4MPlanners.

I'm so looking to hearing from you, I want to know EVERYTHING...and welcome you to the glory of The Four Man Plan!

Image

 

Image

4MP  n. abbreviation for The Four Man Plan

4(m)p = u + 1 n. the fundamental equation of The Four Man Plan

4MPlanner n. a woman that is practicing The Four Man Plan

Cinderella n. the sum of the equation cindy-y+e(2)arl(2)

Chick’s Chick n. a woman that honors all women and their relationships

Chuck v. to remove a Two and a Quarter Man from The Four Man Plan because his 4MPlanner is sleeping with someone new

Dick’s Chick n. a woman who throws herself at married or otherwise monogamous men 

Half Man n. a Plan Man that a 4MPlanner has had at least 3 dates with and knows that she is seeing other men

Mantris Graph n. a square 4x4 grid used by a 4MPlanner to track the progress of her Plan Men

postulate n. something that is assumed to be true and that is used as the basis of an argument or theory. Example: Postulate #5 - You Suck at Love

principle n. an accepted or professed rule of action or conduct. Example: Principle #1 - The Yes Factor

Prince Charming n. a mythical creature whose debunking leads to trauma and drama

Plan Man n. any man that is dating a 4MPlanner

Quarter Man n. a Plan Man that has had contact but no more than 2 dates with a 4MPlanner

theory n. a coherent group of general propositions used to explain a class of phenomena

Three and a Half Man n. the Plan Man that can be described as honest, loving and willing and has initiated and has been accepted into a monogamous relationship with a 4MPlanner

Two and a Quarter Man n. the one Plan Man that a 4MPlanner is sleeping with

Whole Man n. 1. a Plan Man that has spoken the word "love" to his 4MPlanner 2. a Plan Man that has gotten to second base with his 4MPlanner

 

Image

Cindy added PRINCIPLE #7: SAY THANK YOU or I'LL SPANK YOU.  Read it here then print it out and clip it to your book:

Early on, there were some questions about the issue of what to do with a Plan Man after a date.  It suddenly occurred to me that I left out a VERY IMPORTANT part of the process.  The post-date-follow-up THANK YOU!  (Thanks to Rosabella and Divagrrrl for bringing light to this!)

 SAY THANK YOU or I'LL SPANK YOU

PRINCIPLE #7:

 

There are several ways to THANK a Plan Man after a date.  Even if you said a heart felt Thank You at the end of your date, it's still necessary to follow up with a bit of goddess graciousness the next day.  By order of graciousness, least to most would be:

 

1) Text

2) Email

3) Voicemail

4) Actual Phone Call

5) Personal handwritten note

 

I would say consider what you WANT to do and then either do that or for extra credit take it one or more steps higher with a TEXTING minimum. For example, if you didn't particularly like him, but he was not The Ickies, and normally you would just blow him off, you must at least TEXT him. If you really liked him and would normally only be brave enough to email, try CALLING.

 

This exercise is about ACKNOWLEDGMENT, another great addition to your 4MP, life, and relationship tool belt. 

 

When you acknowledge a Plan Man BE SPECIFIC, use his name, talk about the little details that pleased you about him and the date.  Men really love a woman who they are able to make happy. They especially like specifics about what they did to make you happy; it helps us women become less of a mystery and gives men a way to be successful with us. 

 

Men are not mind readers and nothing boosts a man's confidence like having his efforts noticed.  Push the boundaries of your comfort zone on this one.

 

Acknowledgement, like Validation, feels as great to give as it does to receive once you get the hang of it.

 

dating, love, sex, dating advice, romance, online dating, dating plan, science, single
 


Click here to watch segments of Cindy Lu's one-woman-show THE FOUR MAN PLAN! 

Audio Clips

Chemistry.com

Newsfeed

Image
 

The Four Man Plan

is featured in the

December 2007 issue

of Glamour Magazine

 
 
Match.com
Match.com

Polls

How did you hear about The 4MP?
 
What is your FAVORITE online dating site?
 
Chemistry.com